To my Beloved Union Church:
Sunday, February 11th, my last day in worship with you all, is fast approaching. As it does, I am flooded with memories and gratitude for all the fun, funny, heartfelt, difficult, and sad things we’ve been through together in the five and a half years you’ve allowed me to serve as your pastor. You are woven deeply into the fabric of my heart, and you will remain there always; you have changed who I am as a pastor, for the better.
In my time at Union, I have learned so much from you about hospitality, generosity, courage, perseverance, and the powerful ability of music and arts to heal communities. You have challenged me and loved me through many difficult times, and I hope I’ve been able to do the same for you.
Leaving can be a painful but also sacred process. The pain of separation, and the discombobulation of losing someone in your orbit, is very real. There is a grief process, including all those feelings of sadness, anger, bargaining, denial, and acceptance. It is also a time to get to the heart of why someone or something is so important to you, and what that says about what you need and want for the future. That can be the seed of a new beginning.
In the next two weeks, I hope to share as many memories and stories and blessings with you all that I can. And then when I leave, I trust that we will each continue to cherish those, and to hold them as gifts of grace received in gratitude.
Bound by the UCC Ministerial Code of Ethics, there are a few boundaries I must set as I leave my professional relationship with you all and become your former pastor, with the purpose of making space for the new ministry that will grow after I leave.
- I will need to be out of contact with you until at least eighteen months have passed and you are well into building relationships with your new leadership. This includes social media, which has become almost a second form of church, and I will need to disconnect from you there for the same amount of time. (On Facebook, this has the unfortunate term of “unfriending.” It does not mean that you are not my friends or that I don’t love you dearly! But it does mean that we will need to separate our daily lives from each other in a way that social media connections make difficult.) I do promise, though, to send baby photos!
- As a former pastor, I can no longer be your pastor. That means I can’t lead worship, do pastoral care, lead weddings, funerals, baptisms, and other things that I would have done as your pastor.
- Because Louisville is rather close and it is possible to cross paths there, I will be delighted to run into you, but I cannot make appointments or see you in a professional capacity. I won’t be able to discuss with you things about Union Church; the future of your church remains with you. Please understand that if I need to put a limit on the conversations, it is out of love for the church and its health.
I know boundaries can be hard and can sharpen the pain of separation. But a church cannot move forward with a former pastor lurking in the background. Your focus needs to be on your future together, seeking out your next leaders and vision. You can count on my prayers for you, and a love that endures all, even from afar.
Finally, I ask your forgiveness, for things I’ve done poorly and things I’ve left undone. I offer my forgiveness freely to you as well, and feel deeply grateful for God’s grace guiding us through all of this.
Union Church, you are gifted beyond measure with amazing people; deep, committed hearts; extraordinary talent; and genuine generosity. God is so clearly with you and will always be ready to inspire you further toward justice and joy. I will miss you dearly. With deep gratitude for all the time and experiences we’ve shared together,
Rev. Rachel
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